---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: N Sekar <[email protected]>
Date: Sun, Nov 9, 2025, 5:50 PM
Subject: Re: [KeralaIyers] Re: Fwd - Why proling death, accept it gracefully
To: <[email protected]>, Narayanaswamy Sekar <[email protected]
>


Thank you.

Yes, what you say is true.
We can only try and hope.
Hopefully we, or for that matter, none need to undergo this sort of
question.

Anayesa Maranam
Is what one wishes for.

N Sekar

Yahoo Mail: Search, Organize, Conquer
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On Sun, Nov 9, 2025 at 4:13 PM, 'gopala krishnan' via KeralaIyers
<[email protected]> wrote:
Dear Mr. Sekar,

Our children may fully agree to what we  say now, because they don't want
to say anything opposite. But there is even 5% guarantee, they will adhere
so.

They may take us to the corporate hospital where they will be milked still
blood stains appear, whether we may survive or not.

I had a cousin who was a strong communist and intimated his only son and
wife that when  he dies other than taking a cremation ground nothing must
be done. He had his death about three years back. But the wife and son
followed all religious ceremonies after his death. He was very good person
other than being a strong  communist .

Gopalakrishnan

On Sunday 9 November, 2025 at 03:41:20 pm IST, Narayanaswamy Sekar <
[email protected]> wrote:




---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: *N Sekar* <[email protected]>
Date: Sun, Nov 9, 2025 at 2:09 PM
Subject: Re: Fwd - Why proling death, accept it gracefully
To: Rangarajan T.N.C. <[email protected]>, APS Mani <[email protected]>
Cc: Narayanaswamy Sekar <[email protected]>, Chittanandam V. R. <
[email protected]>, Suryanarayana Ambadipudi <[email protected]>,
Mathangi K. Kumar <[email protected]>, Rama (Iyer 123 Group) <
[email protected]>, Srinivasan Sridharan <[email protected]>,
Surendra Varma <[email protected]>


Thanks.

Re: Sri T N C R's observations, my response is:

Yes, it is not an easy decision BUT when we are alive and still active, we
can say to our family members that we don't want to prolong our life by
being put on ventilators or when the treatment would leave us more like
vegetables, than human beings.

What kind of a life one would lead, if he or she is perpetually dependent
on the machines or others - inconveniencing both himself and others. Even
close kith and kin will become tired after some time and will start looking
forward to his departure.

All that she says is Make it known to your close ones these problems and
let her go with dignity and honour.  It takes extraordinary Will to say so
and ensure it is followed.

I have told my son precisely this (if the situation arises) and have also
put a monetary limit on how much can be spent on keeping me alive, in a
more or less vegetable state. I insisted he honours my wish.

I have lived a decent life with reasonable comforts and have no desire to
be a burden, even to my wife. She also shares my feeling and told our son.
Both myself and my wife share the same feelings, how much painful it may be.

Yes, we don't know if our wish will be carried out but nothing prevents us
to state our wish, firmly and insisting on it.

Re: When will anyone know whether death / living in a vegetable state will
come, well,  medical science is advanced enough to come to such a
conclusion.  Given the current Corporate Hospitals tendency to milk the
patients till the last drop, we need to be brutal in talking to them and
get a second / third opinion, where warranted.  The money thus saved, will
help our progeny or if in excess, help others - in education, marriage,
living etc.

My opinion and I know there will be many who may not share this view. But
it is up to each individual.

N Sekar


On Sunday, November 9, 2025 at 08:21:41 AM GMT+4, APS Mani <[email protected]>
wrote:


Thought provoking,  Mani

On Sun, Nov 9, 2025 at 9:46 AM Rangarajan T.N.C. <[email protected]>
wrote:

IMHO this article is full of conflict of interests
Who is going to decide that there is no chance of recovery? If the doctor
says 10% chance what will be the decision? Who will decide when you are
under sedation and cannot express your wish? Will they decide without fear
or guilt even if you have given them to the right to decide?
Some may look at it as war against death, some others as wish to prolong
life. What of the quality of life? The family may like to have him with
them for more time but will soon get exhausted attending to him. But they
will not be able to think of consequences to him but of what people will
say about them. Not an easy decision for the family.

On Saturday, 8 November 2025 at 01:17:14 pm IST, N Sekar <[email protected]>
wrote:


EXCELLENT ARTICLE 💐

*When the body stops cooperating, when there is no chance of recovery, do
not perform treatments on me* -Dr. Lopa Mehta

Dr. Lopa Mehta was a professor at GS Medical College in Mumbai, where she
served as the head of the Anatomy Department. At the age of 78, she wrote a
living will. In it, she clearly stated... “When the body stops cooperating,
when there is no chance of recovery, do not perform treatments on me. No
ventilators, no tubes, no unnecessary hospital commotion. My final moments
should pass peacefully.
Wisdom should take precedence over the stubborn insistence on treatments.”
Dr. Lopa not only wrote this document but also published a research paper
on death. In it, she clarified that death is a natural, inevitable, and
biological process.

According to her argument, modern medicine has never viewed death as an
independent concept. Medicine always assumes that death results from some
disease, and by treating that disease, death can be prevented.
But physiology is far more profound than that.
She argues... the body is not a machine that runs continuously. It is a
limited system with a specific amount of vital energy. This energy does not
come from some stored tank but from the subtle body.
This subtle body is something everyone experiences but cannot see. It is a
system composed of the mind, intellect, memories, and consciousness.
This subtle body acts like a gateway for vital energy. This energy spreads
throughout the body, keeping it alive. The heartbeat, digestion, and the
ability to think all depend on it.
But this energy is not infinite.

Each body has a specific amount of it. Like a fixed battery in a machine,
it cannot be increased or decreased.
“As much as Rama winds the key, that’s how much the doll dances”... as the
saying goes.
Dr. Lopa wrote that when this energy in the body is depleted, the subtle
body separates from the physical body. At that moment, the body becomes
still. We call this “the life force has left.” This process is not related
to any disease or any fault. It is the internal rhythm of the body.
This begins in the womb, progresses, and culminates in death. This energy
is constantly being spent every moment. Every cell, every organ completes
its lifespan. And when the entire body’s “quota” is exhausted, the body
comes to rest peacefully.
The moment of death is not measured by a clock. It is a biological time. It
is different for each individual.
For some, life is complete in 35 years, for others in 90 years. But both
complete their full journey.


If we do not see it as a defeat or something forced, no one dies
incomplete.
According to Dr. Lopa, when modern medicine stubbornly tries to prevent
death, not only the patient’s body but the entire family becomes exhausted.
The cost of a month in the ICU for a breath can sometimes destroy a
lifetime of savings.
Relatives keep saying, “There’s still hope,” but the patient’s body has
long been saying, “Enough.”
That’s why she wrote... “When my time comes, just take me to KEM Hospital.
I trust they won’t intervene unnecessarily. They won’t cause prolonged
suffering in the name of treatment. Do not stop my body. Let it go.”
But the question is... have we made such a decision for ourselves?
Will our family respect that wish? And will those who respect it be
respected in society?
Do our hospitals honor such wishes, or is a bill issued for every breath,
and are accusations made for every death?
This is not so simple. Balancing logic and emotions is perhaps the most
difficult task.
If we learn to see death as a peaceful, inevitable process arising from the
body’s internal rhythm, perhaps the fear of death will lessen, and our
expectations from doctors will become more realistic.
In my opinion, we should stop fighting death and instead prepare to live
before it.
And when that moment comes... face it peacefully, with dignity.

In the words of the Buddha — death is the next stage in the journey of
life. No science can make it eternal.

That’s why we must be able to observe this true state. 🙏🏼

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