Dear Mr. Sekar,
Our children may fully agree to what we say now, because they don't want to
say anything opposite. But there is even 5% guarantee, they will adhere so.
They may take us to the corporate hospital where they will be milked still
blood stains appear, whether we may survive or not.
I had a cousin who was a strong communist and intimated his only son and wife
that when he dies other than taking a cremation ground nothing must be done.
He had his death about three years back. But the wife and son followed all
religious ceremonies after his death. He was very good person other than being
a strong communist .
Gopalakrishnan
On Sunday 9 November, 2025 at 03:41:20 pm IST, Narayanaswamy Sekar
<[email protected]> wrote:
---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: N Sekar <[email protected]>
Date: Sun, Nov 9, 2025 at 2:09 PM
Subject: Re: Fwd - Why proling death, accept it gracefully
To: Rangarajan T.N.C. <[email protected]>, APS Mani <[email protected]>
Cc: Narayanaswamy Sekar <[email protected]>, Chittanandam V. R.
<[email protected]>, Suryanarayana Ambadipudi <[email protected]>,
Mathangi K. Kumar <[email protected]>, Rama (Iyer 123 Group)
<[email protected]>, Srinivasan Sridharan <[email protected]>,
Surendra Varma <[email protected]>
Thanks.
Re: Sri T N C R's observations, my response is:
Yes, it is not an easy decision BUT when we are alive and still active, we can
say to our family members that we don't want to prolong our life by being put
on ventilators or when the treatment would leave us more like vegetables, than
human beings.
What kind of a life one would lead, if he or she is perpetually dependent on
the machines or others - inconveniencing both himself and others. Even close
kith and kin will become tired after some time and will start looking forward
to his departure.
All that she says is Make it known to your close ones these problems and let
her go with dignity and honour. It takes extraordinary Will to say so and
ensure it is followed.
I have told my son precisely this (if the situation arises) and have also put a
monetary limit on how much can be spent on keeping me alive, in a more or less
vegetable state. I insisted he honours my wish.
I have lived a decent life with reasonable comforts and have no desire to be a
burden, even to my wife. She also shares my feeling and told our son. Both
myself and my wife share the same feelings, how much painful it may be.
Yes, we don't know if our wish will be carried out but nothing prevents us to
state our wish, firmly and insisting on it.
Re: When will anyone know whether death / living in a vegetable state will
come, well, medical science is advanced enough to come to such a conclusion.
Given the current Corporate Hospitals tendency to milk the patients till the
last drop, we need to be brutal in talking to them and get a second / third
opinion, where warranted. The money thus saved, will help our progeny or if in
excess, help others - in education, marriage, living etc.
My opinion and I know there will be many who may not share this view. But it is
up to each individual.
N Sekar
On Sunday, November 9, 2025 at 08:21:41 AM GMT+4, APS Mani
<[email protected]> wrote:
Thought provoking, Mani
On Sun, Nov 9, 2025 at 9:46 AM Rangarajan T.N.C. <[email protected]>
wrote:
IMHO this article is full of conflict of interestsWho is going to decide that
there is no chance of recovery? If the doctor says 10% chance what will be the
decision? Who will decide when you are under sedation and cannot express your
wish? Will they decide without fear or guilt even if you have given them to the
right to decide?Some may look at it as war against death, some others as wish
to prolong life. What of the quality of life? The family may like to have him
with them for more time but will soon get exhausted attending to him. But they
will not be able to think of consequences to him but of what people will say
about them. Not an easy decision for the family.
On Saturday, 8 November 2025 at 01:17:14 pm IST, N Sekar
<[email protected]> wrote:
EXCELLENT ARTICLE 💐
*When the body stops cooperating, when there is no chance of recovery, do not
perform treatments on me* -Dr. Lopa Mehta
Dr. Lopa Mehta was a professor at GS Medical College in Mumbai, where she
served as the head of the Anatomy Department. At the age of 78, she wrote a
living will. In it, she clearly stated... “When the body stops cooperating,
when there is no chance of recovery, do not perform treatments on me. No
ventilators, no tubes, no unnecessary hospital commotion. My final moments
should pass peacefully. Wisdom should take precedence over the stubborn
insistence on treatments.” Dr. Lopa not only wrote this document but also
published a research paper on death. In it, she clarified that death is a
natural, inevitable, and biological process.
According to her argument, modern medicine has never viewed death as an
independent concept. Medicine always assumes that death results from some
disease, and by treating that disease, death can be prevented. But physiology
is far more profound than that. She argues... the body is not a machine that
runs continuously. It is a limited system with a specific amount of vital
energy. This energy does not come from some stored tank but from the subtle
body. This subtle body is something everyone experiences but cannot see. It is
a system composed of the mind, intellect, memories, and consciousness. This
subtle body acts like a gateway for vital energy. This energy spreads
throughout the body, keeping it alive. The heartbeat, digestion, and the
ability to think all depend on it. But this energy is not infinite.
Each body has a specific amount of it. Like a fixed battery in a machine, it
cannot be increased or decreased. “As much as Rama winds the key, that’s how
much the doll dances”... as the saying goes. Dr. Lopa wrote that when this
energy in the body is depleted, the subtle body separates from the physical
body. At that moment, the body becomes still. We call this “the life force has
left.” This process is not related to any disease or any fault. It is the
internal rhythm of the body. This begins in the womb, progresses, and
culminates in death. This energy is constantly being spent every moment. Every
cell, every organ completes its lifespan. And when the entire body’s “quota” is
exhausted, the body comes to rest peacefully. The moment of death is not
measured by a clock. It is a biological time. It is different for each
individual. For some, life is complete in 35 years, for others in 90 years.
But both complete their full journey.
If we do not see it as a defeat or something forced, no one dies incomplete.
According to Dr. Lopa, when modern medicine stubbornly tries to prevent death,
not only the patient’s body but the entire family becomes exhausted. The cost
of a month in the ICU for a breath can sometimes destroy a lifetime of savings.
Relatives keep saying, “There’s still hope,” but the patient’s body has long
been saying, “Enough.” That’s why she wrote... “When my time comes, just take
me to KEM Hospital. I trust they won’t intervene unnecessarily. They won’t
cause prolonged suffering in the name of treatment. Do not stop my body. Let it
go.” But the question is... have we made such a decision for ourselves? Will
our family respect that wish? And will those who respect it be respected in
society? Do our hospitals honor such wishes, or is a bill issued for every
breath, and are accusations made for every death? This is not so simple.
Balancing logic and emotions is perhaps the most difficult task. If we learn
to see death as a peaceful, inevitable process arising from the body’s internal
rhythm, perhaps the fear of death will lessen, and our expectations from
doctors will become more realistic. In my opinion, we should stop fighting
death and instead prepare to live before it. And when that moment comes...
face it peacefully, with dignity.
In the words of the Buddha — death is the next stage in the journey of life. No
science can make it eternal.
That’s why we must be able to observe this true state. 🙏🏼
Yahoo Mail: Search, Organize, Conquer
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