September 24 in history:
* 1979 - CompuServe began operation as
1st computer information service
#1:
Kids Will Be Kids . . .
A six-year-old comes crying to his mother
because his little sister pulled his hair.
"Don't be angry," the mother says, "Your little
sister doesn't realize that pulling hair hurts."
A short while later, there's more crying,
and the mother goes to investigate.
This time the sister is bawling and her
brother says, "She knows now."
#2:
The Good Old Days . . .
WHEN MY three-year-old son opened the
birthday gift from his grandmother, he
discovered a water pistol. He squealed
with delight and headed for the nearest
sink. I was not so pleased. I turned to
Mom and said, "I'm surprised at you.
Don't you remember how we used
to drive you crazy with water guns?"
Mom smiled and then replied....." I remember."
#3:
Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust . . .
Stacey makes a new friend at school
and invites her home for the first time.
Stacey excuses herself to fetch her Mom
and introduce her new friend. As her
friend is standing in the living room
next to the fireplace, she picks up the
attractive vase on the mantle.
When Stacey returns with her mother,
her friend is staring curiously into
the vase. "Oh, those are my father's ashes,"
Stacey informs her new friend. However,
this startles her so that she drops the vase
with ashes and broken vase scattering all around.
After turning three shades of red she
stammers out, "Oh, no... I'm,
oh!... I, can't... didn't mean to.."
"It's OK dear," the mother says.
"The vase was just from Wal-Mart."
The new friend catches her breath enough to say,
"But... but your husband's ashes..."
"Well," the mother says, "looks like he'll
just have to get off his lazy rear end and
get the ashtray from the kitchen from now on!"
--
John H. Hoffmann
Personal
E-mail: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
"Take my advice . . . I'm not using it"
-- Ed
----------------------------------------------------------------------
To unsubscribe from this list, send e-mail to [EMAIL PROTECTED] and put
"unsubscribe MAPINFO-L" in the message body, or contact [EMAIL PROTECTED]
