Sorry about the >>> >> > Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the >> > world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that >> > but not with all those flies and death and stuff. -- Mariah Carey >> > >> > Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: I >> > would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because >> if >> > we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but >> we >> > cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever. -- Miss >> > Alabama in the 1994 Miss Universe contest >> > >> > Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the >> same >> > reactions in the brain as marijuana....The researchers also >> >discovered other similarities between the two, but can't remember >> what they >> >are. >> > --Matt Lauer on NBC's Today show, August 22 >> > >> > I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with >> the >> > law. -- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations >> > that he failed to pay his taxes. >> > >> > Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part >> of >> > your life. -- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become >> > spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign >> > >> > I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. -- >> > Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward >> > >> > Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime >> rates >> > in the country. -- Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, D.C. >> > >> > Beginning in February 1976 your assistance benefits will be >> > discontinued... Reason: it has been reported to our office that you >> > expired on January 1, 1976. -- Letter from the Illinois Department >> of >> > Public Aid >> > >> > The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history... this >> > century's history....We all lived in this century. I didn't live >> in >> > this century. -- Dan Quayle, then Indiana senator and Republican >> > vice-presidential candidate during a news conference in which he >> was >> > asked his opinion of the Holocaust >> > >> > Rotarians, be patriotic! Learn to shoot yourself. -- Chicago >> Rotary >> > Club journal, "Gyrator" >> > >> > The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who make >> > them unsafe. -- Frank Rizzo, ex-police chief and mayor of >> >Philadelphia >> > >> > I've always thought that underpopulated countries in Africa are >> vastly >> > underpolluted. -- Lawrence Summers, chief economist of the World >> >Bank, explaining why we should export toxic wastes to Third World >> >countries >> > >> > After finding no qualified candidates for the position of >> principal, >> > the school board is extremely pleased to announce the appointment >> of >> > David Steele to the post. -- Philip Streifer, Superintendent of >> > Schools, Barrington, Rhode Island >> > >> > The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing. -- Dizzy Dean >> > explaining how he felt after being hit on the head by a ball in the >> > 1934 World Series >> > >> > "It's about 90% strength and 40% technique." -- Johnny Walker, >> world >> > middleweight wrist-wrestling champion, on what it takes to be a >> >champ. >> > >> > "If I wasn't talking, I wouldn't know what to say." -- Chico >> Resch, >> > New York Islanders goaltender >> > >> > "We have only one person to blame, and that's each other." -- >> Barry >> > Beck, New York Ranger, on who started a brawl during the National >> > Hockey League's Stanley Cup playoffs >> > >> > "I'm wearing these gloves for my hands." -- Yogi Berra, when >> asked >> > why he was wearing gloves >> > >> > "He fakes a bluff." -- Ron Fairly, Giants broadcast announcer >> > >> > "I don't know. I'm not in shape yet." -- Yogi Berra, when asked his >> > cap size >> > >> > "It could permanently hurt a batter for a long time." -- Pete >> Rose, >> > Cincinnati Reds, speaking about a brushback pitch >> > >> > "Fans, don't fail to miss tomorrow's game." -- Dizzy Dean, >> baseball >> > great turned sports announcer >> > >> > "Me and George and Billy are two of a kind." -- Mickey Rivers, >> Texas >> > Rangers outfielder, on his warm relationship with Yankee owner >> > Steinbrenner and manager Billy Martin >> > >> > "His reputation preceded him before he got here." -- Don Mattingly, >> > New York Yankee, on Mets pitcher Dwight Gooden >> > >> > "Even Napoleon had his Watergate." -- Danny Ozark, Philadelphia >> > Phillies manager, commenting on a Phillies' ten-game losing streak >> > >> > "I don't want to tell you any half-truths unless they're completely >> > accurate." -- Dennis Rappaport, boxing manager, explaining his >> > silence regarding boxer Thomas Hearns >> > >> > "Arnie 'Palmer, usually a great putter, seems to be having trouble >> > with his long putt. However he has no trouble dropping his >> shorts." >> > -- Golf broadcaster on the air during a tournament >> > >> > "A lot of people my age are dead at the present time." --- Casey >> > Stengel, baseball great, Yankees and Mets manager >> > >> > "The similarities between me and my father are different." -- Dale >> > Berra, Yogi Berra's son >> >
