I find it much easier to mess with the initscript with the update-rc.d script. To remove for example xdm from the initscript you enter: 'update-rc.d xdm remove' If do do that, then xdm wont start from init any more. I dont know the exact command but you can do it the other way to, that is, you can make it start with init with update-rc.d
I think it is update-rc.d xdm defaults. I just read the manpage in a hury now, so i may have got it wrong now, but just read the manpage and you will know what to do. I also may have understod this thread completly wrong, please just ignore me if this make no sense to you. I have'nt slept for a LONG time.. nevermind if that is the case.