I apologize, I forgot to mention that I'm using the original GHC 7.6.3, *not* the version packaged with Debian.
http://www.haskell.org/ghc/download_ghc_7_6_3
It explicitly mentions on the web page that:

> This is a complete build, including interactive system, profiling libraries and documentation. It was made on a Debian 6.0 "squeeze" system and requires |libgmp.so.3|.

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