Authors,
While reviewing this document during AUTH48, please resolve (as necessary) the
following questions, which are also in the XML file.
1) <!--[rfced] Is the document title redundant (especially if the
abbreviation is expanded)? If our suggested title is not
agreeable, please let us know if a rephrase can be made. Note
that we have updated to use "Segment Type Extensions" (with Type
singular). Note that any changes to the document title will also
be reflected in the reference entry pointing to this document in
RFC-to-be 9830.
Original:
Segment Routing Segment Types Extensions for BGP SR Policy
As it would be expanded:
Segment Routing Segment Types Extensions for BGP Segment Routing Policy
Perhaps:
Segment Type Extensions for BGP Segment Routing (SR) Policy
With a corresponding update to the abbreviated title:
Original:
SR Segment Type Ext for BGP SR Policy
Perhaps:
Segment Type Ext for BGP SR Policy
-->
2) <!-- [rfced] Please insert any keywords (beyond those that appear in
the title) for use on https://www.rfc-editor.org/search. -->
3) <!--[rfced] Section 2: Please review and confirm that the switch
between "Segment List sub-TLV" in the first paragraph and
"Segment sub-TLV" in the second is intentional.
Original:
The Segment List sub-TLV [I-D.ietf-idr-sr-policy-safi] encodes a....
and
A Segment sub-TLV describes a single segment in a segment list (i.e.,
-->
4) <!-- [rfced] The following text from Section 2 may require
clarification:
"As specified in Sections 2.4.4 and 2.4.4.2 of [RFC9830],
validation of an explicit path encoded by the Segment List sub-TLV
is beyond the scope of BGP and performed by the Segment Routing
Policy Module (SRPM) as described in Section 5 of [RFC9256]."
The term "Segment Routing Policy Module (SRPM)" doesn't appear in
[RFC9256].
-->
5) <!--[rfced] The following text led us to believe that the subsection
titles of Section 2 would match the Type names listed in Section
2 itself: but they do not. Please review and let us know if a
closer 1:1 matchup is desired between these.
Original:
[I-D.ietf-idr-sr-policy-safi] specifies Segment Type Sub-TLVs for the
segment types A and B. The following sub-sections specify the sub-
TLVs used for encoding each of the other Segment Types above.
-->
6) <!--[rfced] Please consider rephrasing the following text (the stacked
uses of "of" and repetition of "interface" might benefit from a
change).
Original:
Local Interface ID: 4 octets of interface index of local interface
(refer TLV 258 of [RFC9552]).
-->
7) <!-- [rfced] We note that Section 2.4.4.2.4 of [RFC9830] uses the term
"SRv6 SID Endpoint Behavior and Structure" rather than "SRv6
Endpoint Behavior and SID Structure". Please let us know if/how
these uses may be made consistent.
-->
8) <!--[rfced] Please review the entries in Table 1 in light of this response
regarding the names of sub-TLVs from Ketan when we discussed this topic for
RFC-to-be 9830:
Ketan:
"The names of the segments (titles) are to be "Segment Type X" while the name
of the sub-TLVs are to be "Type X Segment sub-TLV" (I've seen both sub-TLV and
Sub-TLV - either is OK but we should have been consistent). The "Type-1" is
actually "Type A Segment sub-TLV"."
If updates are necessary to the corresponding IANA registry, we will
communicate them on your behalf once AUTH48 concludes.
-->
9) <!-- [rfced] FYI - We have added expansions for abbreviations upon
first use per Section 3.6 of RFC 7322 ("RFC Style Guide"). Please
review each expansion in the document carefully to ensure
correctness.
-->
10) <!-- [rfced] Please review the "Inclusive Language" portion of the
online Style Guide
<https://www.rfc-editor.org/styleguide/part2/#inclusive_language>
and let us know if any changes are needed. Updates of this
nature typically result in more precise language, which is
helpful for readers.
Note that our script did not flag any words in particular, but this
should still be reviewed as a best practice.
-->
Thank you.
Megan Ferguson
RFC Production Center
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--------------------------------------
RFC9831 (draft-ietf-idr-bgp-sr-segtypes-ext-08)
Title : Segment Routing Segment Types Extensions for BGP SR Policy
Author(s) : K. Talaulikar, C. Filsfils, S. Previdi, P. Mattes, D. Jain
WG Chair(s) : Susan Hares, Keyur Patel, Jeffrey Haas
Area Director(s) : Jim Guichard, Ketan Talaulikar, Gunter Van de Velde
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