In the latest proposal you just sent, the middle sentence (apparently
originating from Quynh)
still reads pretty clumsy and kind to overlaps with the first sentence.
How about this?
The CertTemplate structure allows entities requesting a certificate
to specify the data fields that they want to be included. Typically,
they are required to provide at least the publicKey field.
A CertTemplate structure is identical to a TBSCertificate structure (see
[RFC 5280])
but with all fields optional/situational.
David
On 11.07.25 16:30, John Gray wrote:
I think there is a problem with the rephrasing. This new proposal
seems to have an incomplete sentence, and using "wish to get included"
seems kind of jarring to me. The phrase "want to be included" would
be better, I think.
The sentence "The publicKey field is typically required to provide."
is not complete...
The last sentence is fine
The CertTemplate structure allows entities requesting a certificate
to specify the data fields that they wish to get included.
The publicKey field is typically required to provide. A
CertTemplate structure is identical to a TBSCertificate structure (see
[RFC 5280])
but with all fields optional/situational.
If you really want to further rephrase it, the following works. I
think the comment from Quynh wanted to mention data fields and that is
why publicKey is mentioned, so how about the following:
The CertTemplate structure allows entities requesting a certificate
to specify the data fields that they want to be included.
The structure also allows an end entity or RA to include any other
necessary data, such as the publicKey field, when it is required for
the certificate.
A CertTemplate structure is identical to a TBSCertificate structure
(see [RFC 5280])
but with all fields optional/situational.
Cheers,
John Gray
------------------------------------------------------------------------
*From:* Brockhaus, Hendrik <[email protected]>
*Sent:* Friday, July 11, 2025 2:42 AM
*To:* David von Oheimb
<[email protected]>; Alanna Paloma
<[email protected]>; John Gray <[email protected]>
*Cc:* [email protected] <[email protected]>; Mike Ounsworth
<[email protected]>; [email protected]
<[email protected]>; [email protected] <[email protected]>;
[email protected] <[email protected]>; [email protected]
<[email protected]>; [email protected]
<[email protected]>
*Subject:* AW: [EXTERNAL] [AD] Re: AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9810
<draft-ietf-lamps-rfc4210bis-18> for your review
*WARNING: This email originated outside of Entrust.*
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I like this rephrasing.
Hendrik
*Von:* David von Oheimb <[email protected]>
*Gesendet:* Freitag, 11. Juli 2025 08:40
*An:* Alanna Paloma <[email protected]>; John Gray
<[email protected]>
*Cc:* [email protected]; Brockhaus, Hendrik (FT RPD CST SEA-DE)
<[email protected]>; Mike Ounsworth
<[email protected]>; [email protected];
[email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected];
[email protected]
*Betreff:* Re: [EXTERNAL] [AD] Re: AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9810
<draft-ietf-lamps-rfc4210bis-18> for your review
Hi Alanna et al.,
I suggest streamlining part of the below mentioned paragraph on the
CertTemplate structure,
as follows.
The CertTemplate structure allows entities requesting a certificate
to specify the data fields that they wish to get included.
The publicKey field is typically required to provide. A
CertTemplate structure is identical to a TBSCertificate structure (see
[RFC 5280])
but with all fields optional/situational.
Regards,
David
On 10.07.25 21:05, Alanna Paloma wrote:
Hi John,
Thank you for your reply.
I'm okay with the suggested updated text (I agree it is much
clearer), however there is a typo in it 🙂
It should be "when it is" instead of "when t is"
The CertTemplate structure allows an end entity or RA to
specify as many
data fields as the structure wishes for the requested
certificate. The
structure also allows an end entity or RA to include any other
necessary data,
such as the publicKey field, when it is required for the
certificate. A
CertTemplate structure is identical to a TBSCertificate
structure (see [RFC 5280])
but with all fields optional/situational.
Thanks for spotting this! We have updated the text accordingly.
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